As many of you no doubt know (or know doubt no), some people claim that certain songs played backwords reveal satanic messges (or other, non-satanic messages). I've always heard such things, but have always been too lazy to actually do any research into said matters. Perhaps you've felt the same. Well, NegativeMode is here to fix it for you.
Thanks to Mr. Eric McNett, I've come across Jeff Milner's Backmasking Site. Jeff has taken songs that are rumored to contain messages when played backwards, played them and recorded them backwards, and posted them on the internet (which, of course, is what you do with such things). Stairway to Heaven is there, as are some others, but personally, I think "Hit Me Baby One More Time", by Britney Spears, is the best when played backwards. He has both forwards and backwards lyrics in case you can't decipher the lyrics (or supposed lyrics). Interesting and amusing, and I'm sure it will help you kill at least 10 minutes in your otherwise boring work day. . . .
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Friday, May 27, 2005
We Made the Lyrics, Part I
I have decided that as a weekly feature (or as often as I remember to do it) I will post some lyrics for you from a song by one of this century's most greatly underappreciated artists: Camp Lo (I will, at a later date, discuss the brilliance of Camp Lo, but I'd rather you become familiar with their beautiful verses first). The purpose of this exercise is to open your eyes to a greater power (it will come with time), and to spark discussion over the meaning of the lyrics. To know Camp Lo is to know yourself. . . .
"Bro', kissin in quiet fire
Higher will get us lower
Staufer, she coffe diggin
Riggin' in shattered lifers
We only jive talkin
Razor keep cotton squawkin
Blazin the loose cannans
On top of white diomonds sands
Street corner symphonies spillin
Prisons are lower twistin
Brown Hornet keepin it nappy
Keep us on, keepin on"
"Bro', kissin in quiet fire
Higher will get us lower
Staufer, she coffe diggin
Riggin' in shattered lifers
We only jive talkin
Razor keep cotton squawkin
Blazin the loose cannans
On top of white diomonds sands
Street corner symphonies spillin
Prisons are lower twistin
Brown Hornet keepin it nappy
Keep us on, keepin on"
Romance in the Palmetto State
DJ Skuggs is always making specious claims about the magical nature of growing up and living in South Carolina. For some reason though, any mention of the fine ladies of said state is always conspicuously missing from the conversation. I think that now I know why. The best looking women are always bitches. Just ask Cory Michael Williamson, the Spartanburg County man who was caught trying to make sweet love to his neighbor's dog. According to the CarolinaChannel, "Williamson’s neighbor told sheriff’s deputies that she saw the teen having sexual contact with her 6-month-old dog over the weekend." She may have had a beautiful sheen to her fur, but still, there have to be better looking women in South Carolina. Are there Skuggs?
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Gas Exchange
With gas prices so high these days, we tend to take for granted the ubiquitous availability of gasoline. If you need/want gas, it can usually be found within a 1/4 mile (assuming you live in some sort of urban area of course). It may be expensive, but we can get it, and get it without much hassle or thought.
What had never occured to me before was how difficult it is to get rid of gasoline. You need gas, you go get gas. But when you need to get rid of gas, what do you do? It just so happened today that NegativeMode and PositiveMode found themselves in possession of three containers of gasoline (don't ask). We needed to dispose of said gasoline, and wanted to do so in the safest, most environmentally sound manner possible (we couldn't use the gas in a vehicle because it was mixed slightly with soap, listerine, or bleach (depending on the container, again, don't ask)). What do you do in that situation? So easy to get gas, yet so hard to get rid of gas.
Throwing the gas in the trash would be highly flammable and dangerous, to both passers-by and sanitation workers. Pouring the gas down the drain would result in certain pollution (and probably a fire hazard as well), just as pouring the gas down a sewer would. Disposing the gasoline in a random field would invariably pollute a water supply in time. What to do with the gas?
We took it to a gas station. They sell gas, why not take our gas? Surely they have some way to dispose of gas. Nope, gas stations don't take your gas. Even an online search of the internet, which knows all, provides little help. Most sites tell you what not to do with gas, but never what to do (see, e.g. American Petroleum Institute, EPA). I think the best option would be burning some sort of effigy: maybe of President Bush, Celine Dion, Hayden Christensen, etc., but we have neither the time nor place for proper effiging. So, if anyone would like to take some gasoline, please let one of the MODES know. . . .
What had never occured to me before was how difficult it is to get rid of gasoline. You need gas, you go get gas. But when you need to get rid of gas, what do you do? It just so happened today that NegativeMode and PositiveMode found themselves in possession of three containers of gasoline (don't ask). We needed to dispose of said gasoline, and wanted to do so in the safest, most environmentally sound manner possible (we couldn't use the gas in a vehicle because it was mixed slightly with soap, listerine, or bleach (depending on the container, again, don't ask)). What do you do in that situation? So easy to get gas, yet so hard to get rid of gas.
Throwing the gas in the trash would be highly flammable and dangerous, to both passers-by and sanitation workers. Pouring the gas down the drain would result in certain pollution (and probably a fire hazard as well), just as pouring the gas down a sewer would. Disposing the gasoline in a random field would invariably pollute a water supply in time. What to do with the gas?
We took it to a gas station. They sell gas, why not take our gas? Surely they have some way to dispose of gas. Nope, gas stations don't take your gas. Even an online search of the internet, which knows all, provides little help. Most sites tell you what not to do with gas, but never what to do (see, e.g. American Petroleum Institute, EPA). I think the best option would be burning some sort of effigy: maybe of President Bush, Celine Dion, Hayden Christensen, etc., but we have neither the time nor place for proper effiging. So, if anyone would like to take some gasoline, please let one of the MODES know. . . .
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Fun Facts About Your Favorite Pastime - Drinking
As you are all aware, I have not been updating NegativeMode with the ferver with which I once did. I apoligize for this slowdown, and promise you that it will pick back up next week. One of the reasons for said lack of production has been my increased alcoholic consumption in the past two weeks. Having nothing to do (for the most part) and saying good bye to close friends can tend to lead to dinners, drinks, more drinks, hangovers, etc. You all know that. So, in honor of the beverage that we all love so much, here is a list of 113 fun alcohol trivia tidbits. A few of my favorites. . . .
- Spectators at Indy car races consume more blush wine than the average American, according to interviews of 200,000 adults in the top 75 markets. The inteviews also found that golfers drink domestic beer 64% more often than imported beer and that attendees of R&B, rap or hip-hop concerts are 94% more likely than the average person to drink champagne.
- There is a cloud of alcohol in outer space with enough alcohol to make four trillion-trillion drinks. It's free for the taking. . . but it's 10,000 light years away from Earth.
- In old England, a whistle was baked into the rim or handle of ceramic cups used by pub patrons. When they wanted a refill, they used the whistle to get service. So when people went drinking, they would "wet their whistle."
Friday, May 20, 2005
Dime Animosity
Again, I apoligize for my lack of creativity. During this week of rest I have been quite busy doing nothing and drinking. Let me tell you, the two can be quite exhausting. Also, I've been cleaning my apartment for my parents' annual visit. Also exhausting, especially when you are very lazy.
In any event, I've found another good web page to amuse you: this guy who really hates dimes. After reading his propaganda, I have decided that I too, hate dimes. If you think about it, they really do suck. Where I don't agree with the "I Hate Dimes" guy is over the other coins, i.e., pennies and nickels. He extols the values of the penny and nickel. Personally, I hate them. I really hate all coinage other than the mighty quarter. That's just me though. Anyway, read up, and I'll be back to amuse you shortly. . . .
In any event, I've found another good web page to amuse you: this guy who really hates dimes. After reading his propaganda, I have decided that I too, hate dimes. If you think about it, they really do suck. Where I don't agree with the "I Hate Dimes" guy is over the other coins, i.e., pennies and nickels. He extols the values of the penny and nickel. Personally, I hate them. I really hate all coinage other than the mighty quarter. That's just me though. Anyway, read up, and I'll be back to amuse you shortly. . . .
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Too Much Pleasure
I apoligize for the lack of creative content on NegativeMode this week. I finished law school last week, and graduation isn't until this weekend, so I really have nothing to do. What that translates to is "I have nothing to procrastinate from doing", i.e., blogging. Still, I know you out there need your NegativeMode fix, so I'll do what I can.
In the meantime, read this, it's pretty amusing. . . .
In the meantime, read this, it's pretty amusing. . . .
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Travel Warning
I know that many of my readers are avid travelers, and that several of you are going on exotic trips this August following your respective state bar exams. As NegativeMode is concerned first with your safety (second with Camp Lo), the following travel advisory is offered: don't sleep on your stomach in Zanzibar. Why? Because Popo Bawa will get you!
You may be wondering who Popo Bawa is. Well, those of you skilled in Indian Oceanic Superstition know that Popo Bawa is a bat-like ogre who anally rapes men, women, and children. The only known way to keep Popo Bawa away is to read the Koran. Popo Bawa likes to attack behind closed doors, and local peoples' belief in the sodomizing gremlin's unnatural lust is so strong that entire villages will sleep outside so as to avoid unwanted "sex in an uncomfortable place" (like the back of a volkswagen). According to Reuters, "Some attacks were heralded by the sound of giant wings and claws rattling and scraping on huts' tin roofs. Others cringed in terror at what sounded like a car engine ticking over." So, if you're in Zanzibar, and you hear a car starting, pucker up tight, 'cause you know whatsacomin'.
As if this sodomizing gremlin wasn't strange enough, the apparition's sexually voracious appetitie is most active during election time. It makes no difference which party wins the election, Popo Bawa is apolitical, "he can strike even if the opposition wins the elections." (Reuters, BBC). With elections coming up in October of this year, Popo Bawa may be on the prowl for some fresh American tail, so please dear readers, read the Koran and sleep outside (and on your back) when in Tanzania, because Popo Bawa may come looking for you . . . unless, of course, you like that sort of thing. . . .
You may be wondering who Popo Bawa is. Well, those of you skilled in Indian Oceanic Superstition know that Popo Bawa is a bat-like ogre who anally rapes men, women, and children. The only known way to keep Popo Bawa away is to read the Koran. Popo Bawa likes to attack behind closed doors, and local peoples' belief in the sodomizing gremlin's unnatural lust is so strong that entire villages will sleep outside so as to avoid unwanted "sex in an uncomfortable place" (like the back of a volkswagen). According to Reuters, "Some attacks were heralded by the sound of giant wings and claws rattling and scraping on huts' tin roofs. Others cringed in terror at what sounded like a car engine ticking over." So, if you're in Zanzibar, and you hear a car starting, pucker up tight, 'cause you know whatsacomin'.
As if this sodomizing gremlin wasn't strange enough, the apparition's sexually voracious appetitie is most active during election time. It makes no difference which party wins the election, Popo Bawa is apolitical, "he can strike even if the opposition wins the elections." (Reuters, BBC). With elections coming up in October of this year, Popo Bawa may be on the prowl for some fresh American tail, so please dear readers, read the Koran and sleep outside (and on your back) when in Tanzania, because Popo Bawa may come looking for you . . . unless, of course, you like that sort of thing. . . .
Monday, May 16, 2005
What is an "A-Shirt"?
I like to wear an undershirt betwixt my soft skin and my outer, for-the-public-to-see, shirt. If the outer shirt of the day happens to be a t-shirt, my first choice for undershirt would be a sleeveless, ribbed, tight fitting, undergarment, i.e., a "wifebeater". I have been wearing wifebeaters as undershirts for the better part of a decade now, and throughout said usage, I have, without fail, referred to these shirts as the aforementioned "wifebeaters".
Of course, the term "wifebeater" is not without controversy. A few years back, I needed to update my wifebeater collection, so I asked my mom if she could pick up a pack or two for me while she was out at K-Mart, Target, etc. She immediately responded that the term that I had so nonchalantly used, "wifebeater", was disparaging, offensive, and improper. While I did not disagree that glamorizing spousal abuse through fashionistic terms was proper, I was at a loss as to what else to call said garment. (Kim Gandy, president of the National Organization for Women, has said that, "the implication [of using the term to discribe the undershirt] is that wife beating is not viewed as sufficiently serious to lift it above the level of something that's OK to joke about.")
Turns out, a wifebeater (the garment) is properly known as an "A-Shirt" (by the "major three": Fruit of the Loom, Hanes, and Jockey). I was not aware this term existed until several years after I had already taken to wearing "a-shirts" on a regular basis. Anyway, as you can see from the above links to the major underwear producers, wifebeaters are packaged as "a-shirts", which leads a question that I have been pondering for quite some time: When are the manufacturers of these undershirts going to end the charade and just call a spade a spade, i.e., when is the Hanes, etc. packaging just going to say "wifebeater"?
Personally, I think it's a good twenty-plus years away, if ever. In fact, Wikipedia states that the term has possibly been around since the 70s, which means that the major three underwear giants have withstood the adament pro-wifebeater-namechange lobby for 30-plus years now. Impressive. So, what do you think? Will the common, "popular" term take over for the "technical" term, or are "a-shirts" here to stay. . . .
Of course, the term "wifebeater" is not without controversy. A few years back, I needed to update my wifebeater collection, so I asked my mom if she could pick up a pack or two for me while she was out at K-Mart, Target, etc. She immediately responded that the term that I had so nonchalantly used, "wifebeater", was disparaging, offensive, and improper. While I did not disagree that glamorizing spousal abuse through fashionistic terms was proper, I was at a loss as to what else to call said garment. (Kim Gandy, president of the National Organization for Women, has said that, "the implication [of using the term to discribe the undershirt] is that wife beating is not viewed as sufficiently serious to lift it above the level of something that's OK to joke about.")
Turns out, a wifebeater (the garment) is properly known as an "A-Shirt" (by the "major three": Fruit of the Loom, Hanes, and Jockey). I was not aware this term existed until several years after I had already taken to wearing "a-shirts" on a regular basis. Anyway, as you can see from the above links to the major underwear producers, wifebeaters are packaged as "a-shirts", which leads a question that I have been pondering for quite some time: When are the manufacturers of these undershirts going to end the charade and just call a spade a spade, i.e., when is the Hanes, etc. packaging just going to say "wifebeater"?
Personally, I think it's a good twenty-plus years away, if ever. In fact, Wikipedia states that the term has possibly been around since the 70s, which means that the major three underwear giants have withstood the adament pro-wifebeater-namechange lobby for 30-plus years now. Impressive. So, what do you think? Will the common, "popular" term take over for the "technical" term, or are "a-shirts" here to stay. . . .
Friday, May 13, 2005
PSA: Airplane 2 on Sale
As my loyal readers know (and the loyal readers of PositiveMode know), the name of this site, NegativeMode, was chosen from a quote by First Officer Dunn in Airplane 2 (so was PositiveMode). If you didn't know the derivation of NegativeMode, you can read my original post about it here. Ok, now that we're all caught up comes the public service announcement. . . .
Airplane 2 is currently on sale at Walmart for only $5.50 (not online)!!! Normally I wouldn't endorse anything Walmart has to sell, as I think that it is a fairly evil corporation (no need to blog about that tired subject), but I couldn't pass this up. Each and every one of you should go to Walmart right now, buy Airplane 2, and watch it immediately. One warning: don't waste your time going to the State College Walmart to get it, cause I already bought up all the remaining copies (seriously, I did). Allllllright Sir. . . .
Airplane 2 is currently on sale at Walmart for only $5.50 (not online)!!! Normally I wouldn't endorse anything Walmart has to sell, as I think that it is a fairly evil corporation (no need to blog about that tired subject), but I couldn't pass this up. Each and every one of you should go to Walmart right now, buy Airplane 2, and watch it immediately. One warning: don't waste your time going to the State College Walmart to get it, cause I already bought up all the remaining copies (seriously, I did). Allllllright Sir. . . .
Drinkin' on the Cheap
I feel rich. Why? Because I'm in State College. The amazing thing is, I am currently unemployed (until Septmeber at least). It doesn't matter. When you're used to drinking in a large city, be it LA, NYC, or DC you get used to paying big city prices. I'm estatic when I can get a $3 beer in DC.
You can only imagine my delight when last night I walked into a bar, ordered two shots and a pitcher and the bartender told me $5.50. Five-fiddy! That's just a shocking number to hear. It's pretty much like being free. The same thing would have cost me over $20 in DC. At the same time, the bar next door had a special: $1 for a pitcher, A PITCHER, of Ice House. That's just bad news. No wonder people are always wasted in this city. Why not just sell blow for a nickel?
What's my point? There is none. I'm just excited to go out tonight with a $20 in my wallet and know that I have enough for both my sister and me to get rip-roarin' drunk. I think that there's something to be said for that. . . .
NegativeMode ShoutOut: To my sister for graduating from Penn State this weekend. Congratulations. Shouldn't I get some sort of certificate showing that I am now officially old?
You can only imagine my delight when last night I walked into a bar, ordered two shots and a pitcher and the bartender told me $5.50. Five-fiddy! That's just a shocking number to hear. It's pretty much like being free. The same thing would have cost me over $20 in DC. At the same time, the bar next door had a special: $1 for a pitcher, A PITCHER, of Ice House. That's just bad news. No wonder people are always wasted in this city. Why not just sell blow for a nickel?
What's my point? There is none. I'm just excited to go out tonight with a $20 in my wallet and know that I have enough for both my sister and me to get rip-roarin' drunk. I think that there's something to be said for that. . . .
NegativeMode ShoutOut: To my sister for graduating from Penn State this weekend. Congratulations. Shouldn't I get some sort of certificate showing that I am now officially old?
Warning: Nuts in Cock
The Canadian government (Canadian Food Inspection Agency to be specific) has issued a warning that there may be nuts in Cock brand curry (See warning here). I just wanted to give a heads up to my readers. While you may love Cock . . . brand curry, you must, I repeat, you must be wary of the nuts that oftentimes accompany said Cock. Canada says beware, and I wouldn't cross Canada.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Sad, Stupid Law
I don't really have must time to comment much, but check out this article from RockyMountainNews re: the city of Denver's pit bull ban. Now, I probably don't fall into the category of animal lover (unless you're talking about a fine steak), nor even dog lover (I do like Floyd and Sadie), but I have a huge problem with Denver's law, and especially their enforcement of said law. The law: in Denver it is illegal to own a pit bull. If you own one, the police will come to your door (with force if necessary), take your dog from you, and have it killed. That's sick.
This is a reaction, of course, to the death of a little girl by a pit bull. And it's an insane, stupid, reaction. Any dog can be trained (i.e., tortured) to be a brutal killer (Even Jet Li. You can see for yourself in Unleashed, in theaters this Friday). Starve, beat, whip a collie and you'll get the same monsterous animal. It's irrationality at its highest degree to then round up all collies for death (doggie genocide?). Anyway, no need for me to rant, you get the idea. . . .
This is a reaction, of course, to the death of a little girl by a pit bull. And it's an insane, stupid, reaction. Any dog can be trained (i.e., tortured) to be a brutal killer (Even Jet Li. You can see for yourself in Unleashed, in theaters this Friday). Starve, beat, whip a collie and you'll get the same monsterous animal. It's irrationality at its highest degree to then round up all collies for death (doggie genocide?). Anyway, no need for me to rant, you get the idea. . . .
Monday, May 09, 2005
Art is Money
Recently, I've come across the works of Dutch artist Kamiel Proost. Proost paints U.S. one and five dollar bills (physically paints on the bills). I think they're very well done artistically. I also think that they're pretty cool and pleasant to look at. They soothe me. I hope they soothe you too. You can find his work at www.kamielproost.com if you so desire. I'm posting my three favorite works (click on the pictures to see the paintings up close):
"The Gasoline-Station"
"Rasta Abe" (So named by me. Untitled by Proost.)
"Pussy" (You may have seen "Pussy" in Playboy this month (and I'm talking about the artwork pictured below, not the other kind you deviant (although that was also prominately featured this month)))
"The Gasoline-Station"
"Rasta Abe" (So named by me. Untitled by Proost.)
"Pussy" (You may have seen "Pussy" in Playboy this month (and I'm talking about the artwork pictured below, not the other kind you deviant (although that was also prominately featured this month)))
Sunday, May 08, 2005
Aaaaads by Goooooogle
I must admit, I was a bit worried at first that adding Google advertising to NegativeMode would somehow take away from the saavy intellectualism that clearly pervades this site. I was wrong. I am actually quite pleased with the ads that you see on the right of your screen, under "cash flow". First, I feel that they lend a professional air to the site.
Second, and more importantly, I find them to be quite amusing. For the past few days, for instance, the four ads have consisted of three ads for scissors with an ad for Bayside High School clothing thrown in for good measure. Obviously, I understand that the ads are generated based on both my postings and your responses, but seriously, are most of my readers really in the market for scissors? For that matter, is anyone really in the market by scissors? Aren't they really one of those items that you just have? Do any of you search the internet in hopes of finding the perfect pair of scissors (ironic note: by using the word "scissors" five times (including this one) I have almost certainly guaranteeded more scissor-related (six) advertising)?
On the other hand, those programmers over at Google advertising really hit the nail on the proverbial head with the advertising for Bayside High School Tigers clothing. I know for a fact that several of you would love nothing more than to walk around in the same gym shirt that Slater, Zac, Lisa, etc. wore. In fact, you're going to click on the link right now so you can be the first on your block to have said shirt. It's okay, go for it.
I'd also like to point out that the advertising is a great measuring stick for how cool your blog is. For example, NegativeMode has scissors and Bayside Tigers merchandise. PositiveMode, on the other hand has ads for you to get your own blog (that's really just saying that you could write something better than the tripe you're already reading, i.e., PositiveMode, isn't it?). In conclusion: Bayside Tigers, Bayside Tigers, scissors, scissors, Bayside Tigers. . . .
Note: This was not an attmept to get you to click on the advertising links for me to get money. I think I get something like 2 cents per click, and I average about 40 readers a day. Until my readership is closer to 1,000, I'm not quiting my day job (which is nothing right now, but I like it).
7:00pm EDIT: I've noticed that occasionally when NegativeMode loads, there is an advertisement for Boris Wilnitsky Fine Arts, featuring a "great variety of paintings from the Soviet Socialist Realism period." Obvioulsy, that ad is there because of the picture of NegativeMode and Stalin, but does this mean that said picture qualifies as Soviet Socialist Realism art? Maybe I missed my calling. . . .
Second, and more importantly, I find them to be quite amusing. For the past few days, for instance, the four ads have consisted of three ads for scissors with an ad for Bayside High School clothing thrown in for good measure. Obviously, I understand that the ads are generated based on both my postings and your responses, but seriously, are most of my readers really in the market for scissors? For that matter, is anyone really in the market by scissors? Aren't they really one of those items that you just have? Do any of you search the internet in hopes of finding the perfect pair of scissors (ironic note: by using the word "scissors" five times (including this one) I have almost certainly guaranteeded more scissor-related (six) advertising)?
On the other hand, those programmers over at Google advertising really hit the nail on the proverbial head with the advertising for Bayside High School Tigers clothing. I know for a fact that several of you would love nothing more than to walk around in the same gym shirt that Slater, Zac, Lisa, etc. wore. In fact, you're going to click on the link right now so you can be the first on your block to have said shirt. It's okay, go for it.
I'd also like to point out that the advertising is a great measuring stick for how cool your blog is. For example, NegativeMode has scissors and Bayside Tigers merchandise. PositiveMode, on the other hand has ads for you to get your own blog (that's really just saying that you could write something better than the tripe you're already reading, i.e., PositiveMode, isn't it?). In conclusion: Bayside Tigers, Bayside Tigers, scissors, scissors, Bayside Tigers. . . .
Note: This was not an attmept to get you to click on the advertising links for me to get money. I think I get something like 2 cents per click, and I average about 40 readers a day. Until my readership is closer to 1,000, I'm not quiting my day job (which is nothing right now, but I like it).
7:00pm EDIT: I've noticed that occasionally when NegativeMode loads, there is an advertisement for Boris Wilnitsky Fine Arts, featuring a "great variety of paintings from the Soviet Socialist Realism period." Obvioulsy, that ad is there because of the picture of NegativeMode and Stalin, but does this mean that said picture qualifies as Soviet Socialist Realism art? Maybe I missed my calling. . . .
Saturday, May 07, 2005
From the Really Bad Ideas File. . . .
NegativeMode Update (5.8.05): The link to the story below is not longer working. The main reason is because the story that it linked to was not really a BBC news story, but rather a web page created by a UVA student (the comments to this post explain in greater detail thanks to DJ Skuggs). I'll leave this post up, because it presents an interesting question still open for debate: Could 40 unarmed midgets really defeat one full-grown, enraged, African lion? Discuss. . . .
When the president of the Cambodian Midget Fighting League ("CMFL") received an angry complaint from a disgruntled fan, he did something about it. The CMFL president had advertised that his midget fighters would "take on anything; man, beast or machine." The angry fan, wanting to prove him wrong, disputed whether or not his tiny-42 person fighting force could take on a full-grown african lion. The CMFL president, not one to back down from a challenge, feeling that as his fighters had a 42-1 advantage, they could out-wit and out-muscle the lion. Boy was he wrong (fake story/webpage here).
The fight took place in the coliseum of Cambodian city Kâmpóng Chhnãng. The fight sold out three weeks in advance, and was sanctioned by the Cambodian government (as long as they got 50% commission on ticket sales). The result of the fight?
On a completely unrelated topic: As NegativeMode has been trying to keep you all abreast of the various minor holidays that have been occuring over the past few days, today's holiday is . . . National Haiku Day (the date is 5/7/5, get it?). Go write a haiku, you know you want to.
When the president of the Cambodian Midget Fighting League ("CMFL") received an angry complaint from a disgruntled fan, he did something about it. The CMFL president had advertised that his midget fighters would "take on anything; man, beast or machine." The angry fan, wanting to prove him wrong, disputed whether or not his tiny-42 person fighting force could take on a full-grown african lion. The CMFL president, not one to back down from a challenge, feeling that as his fighters had a 42-1 advantage, they could out-wit and out-muscle the lion. Boy was he wrong (fake story/webpage here).
The fight took place in the coliseum of Cambodian city Kâmpóng Chhnãng. The fight sold out three weeks in advance, and was sanctioned by the Cambodian government (as long as they got 50% commission on ticket sales). The result of the fight?
The fight was called in only 12 minutes, after which 28 fighters were declared dead, while the other 14 suffered severe injuries including broken bones and lost limbs, rendering them unable to fight back.Sounds like the lion won. Obviously, I could go into quite a bit of detail as to why this fight was wrong on about 15 levels (animal cruelty, midget cruetly, people paying to watch, government sanction, etc.), but I think that's pretty obvious. What I find more interesting is why these little people chose to fight a lion. Were they not aware what a lion is? Maybe in Cambodian, the word for '"lion" and "kitten" are the same. Personally, I'm not getting in the ring with a lion with 42 of my largest friends, let alone 42 midgets. A lion will eff you up. I mean, even if you think you're going to win, at least a few people are going to catch the lions wrath. I'll end with this understatement: it was a poorly conceived idea. . . .
On a completely unrelated topic: As NegativeMode has been trying to keep you all abreast of the various minor holidays that have been occuring over the past few days, today's holiday is . . . National Haiku Day (the date is 5/7/5, get it?). Go write a haiku, you know you want to.
Thursday, May 05, 2005
NEWSFLASH: Tomorrow, May 6th is International No Pants Day!
The headline says it all. Tomorrow, May 6th is international No Pants Day. For those not in the know, No Pants Day is celebrated annually on the first Friday of May. That just happens to be tomorrow. If you'd like more information, check out www.nopantsday.com.
As tomorrow is such a joyous occasion, I have decided to invite any women who want to celebrate No Pants Day over to my apartment. Any men are also welcome to celebrate, just not with me. So ladies, take off your pants, enjoy the holiday, and get on over here. Punch and pie will be served....
As tomorrow is such a joyous occasion, I have decided to invite any women who want to celebrate No Pants Day over to my apartment. Any men are also welcome to celebrate, just not with me. So ladies, take off your pants, enjoy the holiday, and get on over here. Punch and pie will be served....
Feliz Cinco de Mayo
Happy May 5th Anglos. I've decided to celebrate by taking a three hour Decedents' Estates exam in the morning, shooting skeet in the afternoon, and drinking in the evening. I think it's a good plan. In case you were wondering, here are some fun Cinco de Mayo facts:
And that's all I have to say about that. . . .
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And that's all I have to say about that. . . .
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Two Handsomely Great Men
In response to some comments that yours truly looks like Stalin (I'm not sure if that's an insult or a compliment. Personally, I take it as a compliment. That Stalin was one powerful looking dictator, with quite the head of hair. Most bald men would kill for Stalin's hair.), I've decided to post a picture of NegativeMode with the great Soviet leader.
As you can see, the only real similarity is the moustache, but even they differ to a true moustache afficianado. Stalin doesn't have the powerfully handsome jaw-line of NegativeMode (nor David Silver-ish looks), nor does he have the hipster sideburns. It also appears that Stalin's coiffure is far poofier. While NegativeMode does appreciate the comparisons to the great Communist visionary, I'm afraid such approximations are a bit thin at present. Perhaps a charcoal sketch of both NegativeMode and Stalin would yield more similarities. . . .
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Screech on Screech: A Must Read
It's not often that I claim something is a "must read", in fact, I'm pretty sure this is the first time here on NegativeMode that I have ever used that phrase. Well, here it is, your first official must read: "Screech" on "Screech".
I know that both NegativeMode and PositiveMode seem to mention Saved by the Bell a lot, and we hope that you bear with us, but it's for good reason: this was a show that most people our age (twentysomethings) watched every Saturday morning growing up. It was a favorite. It is also currently shown on TBS every morning at from 7-8 am, when many of us are getting ready for work/school/etc. In short, it's hilarious (both intentional and unintentional comedy), it's entertaining, it's nostalgic. I love all things SBTB, and I know many of you do too, so you could only imagine my glee when DJ Skuggs brought the aforementioned article to my attention. It's the transcript from a live chat with Dustin Diamond, a.k.a. "Screech" on 4.28.05 on WashingtonPost.com.
While the whole article is absolutely priceless, most notably for Screech's clear hostility towards anything SBTB related, the real diamond (pun intended) comes from what appears to be Screech's pure, unadulterated, loathing of Slater (Mario Lopez). Here are some of Screech's not so subtle comments:
On a fight scene between Zac and Slater: "When you mix adolescent youth - steroids - and unrequited love, you have a recipe for comedy."
On whether he keeps in touch with the SBTB cast: "I don't visit the unemployment office that much. I live in Wisconsin now so I don't get a chance to see them that often, unless my comedy tour takes me to Cali. Still there is no guarantee that I will be able to get onto the set of Pet Star (shitty show on Animal Planet hosted by Slater).
On the DC mascot "Screech" and whether he misses Slater (the answer doesn't make sense other than the attack on Lopez): "The Washington Slaters would be cool but the whole team would have to cheat on their wives."
On Slater hosting the male equivalent of "The View": "Acting is just that, acting. Pretending. The catch is, a lot of these Hollywood star types are doing they're best acting off stage. I pretend to be dorky on screen for a job. They pretend to be strong and confident to get through the day.
As you can see, there is clearly some tension (hysterical tension) between Screech and Slater. Again, I can't tell you how great the entire article is, from the Slater insults, to how much Mr. Belding can drink on the set, to how the "real" Screech would kick Zack's ass, etc., etc. Screech also manages to mention his website www.TrustTheDust.com (seriously) several hundred times. Unfortunately, it's not up and running right now, because he's doing the whole thing himself and he hasn't yet figured out how to make a website. Oh, Screech, how we love ye. . . .
I know that both NegativeMode and PositiveMode seem to mention Saved by the Bell a lot, and we hope that you bear with us, but it's for good reason: this was a show that most people our age (twentysomethings) watched every Saturday morning growing up. It was a favorite. It is also currently shown on TBS every morning at from 7-8 am, when many of us are getting ready for work/school/etc. In short, it's hilarious (both intentional and unintentional comedy), it's entertaining, it's nostalgic. I love all things SBTB, and I know many of you do too, so you could only imagine my glee when DJ Skuggs brought the aforementioned article to my attention. It's the transcript from a live chat with Dustin Diamond, a.k.a. "Screech" on 4.28.05 on WashingtonPost.com.
While the whole article is absolutely priceless, most notably for Screech's clear hostility towards anything SBTB related, the real diamond (pun intended) comes from what appears to be Screech's pure, unadulterated, loathing of Slater (Mario Lopez). Here are some of Screech's not so subtle comments:
On a fight scene between Zac and Slater: "When you mix adolescent youth - steroids - and unrequited love, you have a recipe for comedy."
On whether he keeps in touch with the SBTB cast: "I don't visit the unemployment office that much. I live in Wisconsin now so I don't get a chance to see them that often, unless my comedy tour takes me to Cali. Still there is no guarantee that I will be able to get onto the set of Pet Star
On the DC mascot "Screech" and whether he misses Slater (the answer doesn't make sense other than the attack on Lopez):
On Slater hosting the male equivalent of "The View": "Acting is just that, acting. Pretending. The catch is, a lot of these Hollywood star types are doing they're best acting off stage. I pretend to be dorky on screen for a job. They pretend to be strong and confident to get through the day.
As you can see, there is clearly some tension (hysterical tension) between Screech and Slater. Again, I can't tell you how great the entire article is, from the Slater insults, to how much Mr. Belding can drink on the set, to how the "real" Screech would kick Zack's ass, etc., etc. Screech also manages to mention his website www.TrustTheDust.com (seriously) several hundred times. Unfortunately, it's not up and running right now, because he's doing the whole thing himself and he hasn't yet figured out how to make a website. Oh, Screech, how we love ye. . . .
A Fresh Start. . .
Not really. But as you can see, I've changed the look of NegativeMode slightly. While the original graphic on the top of your screen was nice and all, everyone else who chose this template when starting their blog had the same exact thing. That doesn't fly for NegativeMode. We, as you should be well aware, are not everyone else. NegativeMode is a diamond in the proverbial rough. While you, my loyal readers already know this, the rest of this cyber world does not. So I will continue to tweak, prod, and poke at NegativeMode until it is the absolute best that it can be. If you have any suggestions (both real and smart-assed), I welcome them all. When this thing takes off, just watch out.
SideNote: You may have thought that charcoal sketch was pretty snazzy PortMcClellan, but tell me, how you gonna top NegativeMode's new header? Oh, it's on. . . .
SideNote: You may have thought that charcoal sketch was pretty snazzy PortMcClellan, but tell me, how you gonna top NegativeMode's new header? Oh, it's on. . . .
Monday, May 02, 2005
Ninja's Unite!
Although this blog is growing faster than you could possibly imagine (about 2 new readers every 9 days), I still know the majority of my readers personally. That being said, I also know that the majority of that majority are non compos mentis (legaleese for "a few chickens short of a henhouse"), and find humor in, shall we say, "non-conventional" situations (I also know that at least three of my readers strive to be/already are ninjas). As such, I bring you Miscellaneous Blades. Miscellaneous Blades sells all sorts of swords, daggers, foils, etc. on the internet. While this may sound illegal, Blades has covered their asses with the following disclaimer:
On a completely unrealted topic: since most of you, my readers are deviants (see above), I thought that you should know that bestiality is perfectly legal in Sweden, as long as prosecutors can't prove that the animal suffered physical or psychological injury (read article here). Do with that information what you will. . . .
The weapons sold on this site are meant for complete and utter annihilation of the buyer's target. If you are buying these weapons for research, art, collections, or other non-killing purposes, then we may choose to nullify the lifetime warranty on your blade. We will also send hitmen to your location so that you can personally see first-hand the sharp, sleek, sexy design of any of our blades, in addition to the only single one purpose that they all serve. Also note that killing is illegal in the United States, and pretty much everywhere on Earth except for Canada. These blades are only sold legally in the US if sold without the intent to kill. The only justified use behind these blades is to "eliminate" or to "solve" a problem who has been annoying you.As you can see, these blades are perfectly legal. I'd encourage you all to peruse the site, especially the products page and the comparisons, it's very funny. Great job to Joivan Hendrick who created the site . . . he deserves that A.
On a completely unrealted topic: since most of you, my readers are deviants (see above), I thought that you should know that bestiality is perfectly legal in Sweden, as long as prosecutors can't prove that the animal suffered physical or psychological injury (read article here). Do with that information what you will. . . .
Sunday, May 01, 2005
MODE-Watching
In light of the recent proliferation of "MODE" based websites, I've decided to create a handy menu for your MODE viewing pleasure. As you are no doubt aware (by no doubt, I mean, if you have been reading this blog since day-one), NegativeMode was started to counter the various flimflamery and chicanery that was going on over at PositiveMode. In recent days, it has come to both NegativeMode's and PositiveMode's attention that we are being watched by some sort of militant watchdog group, that has somehow convinced the good folks at Blogspot to host their tripe at ModeWatch. NegativeMode has nothing to hide, and welcomes the eye in the proverbial sky. Finally, NegativeMode has recently learned the existence of BearMode. While we aren't quite sure what BearMode is up to yet, it is no doubt something treacherous, as "his people" are want to act.
As I am aware that several of you are quite curious as to the various interactions vis a vis the Modealities and Modeulations, the drop down menu will act as the rabbit-hole to your Alice, whisking you away to whichever MODE you desire. Use it with caution. Those other MODEs are not nearly as pleasant on both the eyes and soul as is NegativeMode, and too much time spent at any Non-NegativeMode-mode would be costly to your health. Good luck.
(If you have no idea what this post is referring to, or the various MODES that are at play in the Blogosphere at this very moment, just look away for the time being, and when you come back, there will be a new post, and none of this will have ever happened (I assure you, I have not lost my mind)....)
As I am aware that several of you are quite curious as to the various interactions vis a vis the Modealities and Modeulations, the drop down menu will act as the rabbit-hole to your Alice, whisking you away to whichever MODE you desire. Use it with caution. Those other MODEs are not nearly as pleasant on both the eyes and soul as is NegativeMode, and too much time spent at any Non-NegativeMode-mode would be costly to your health. Good luck.
(If you have no idea what this post is referring to, or the various MODES that are at play in the Blogosphere at this very moment, just look away for the time being, and when you come back, there will be a new post, and none of this will have ever happened (I assure you, I have not lost my mind)....)
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