Thursday, November 10, 2005

A Study: The Efficacy of Aluminum Foil Helmets

Since I know that most of you out there reading NegativeMode are fairly off-centered, I would not be surprised to find out a good number of you at some point have worn aluminum helmets around as a way to thwart government mind control devices. I'm pretty sure that PositiveMode wears them on a semi-regular basis. Well, as a service to you, my insane readers, I present you with this study conducted by four M.I.T. students on the efficacy of those aluminum mind protecters you've been wearing. According to the research, the helmets can actually amplify certain frequencies used exclusively by the federal government.

Here's the study abstract:
Among a fringe community of paranoids, aluminum helmets serve as the protective measure of choice against invasive radio signals. We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find that although on average all helmets attenuate invasive radio frequencies in either directions (either emanating from an outside source, or emanating from the cranium of the subject), certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified. These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC). Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We theorize that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason.
The entire study can be found here. Time to find some new protection.

5 comments:

PositiveMode said...

I actually discovered this long ago through personal experience, and switched to the newspaper helmet. As far as I can tell, ut doesn't repel government signals, but it looks better (and perhaps less crazy? (and at least it doesn't amplify the transmissions)).

Anonymous said...

I find that in addition to being functional..turn it over and it makes a good ash tray...people really find them sexy

Anonymous said...

I once dated a girl named Delores. Delores Mulva.

PositiveMode said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
PositiveMode said...

I prefer batteries and batteries-related items to Holden Tees.